I have to read this column by Jonah Goldberg every few months. It is one of the funniest things I have ever read. I actually watched the finals of the competition in question and read the column a few days later. It caused me side splitting pain. Here's an excerpt...

Once again, the triumvirate of bridge club old ladies, the gay Mafia, and British empty-nesters has fixed the Westminster Dog Show. This year a ridiculous piece of punt-lint won best in show. The Papillon, as the breed is called by people who aren’t scraping it off the bottom of their shoe, weighs less than a good bowling ball and has fewer uses. It’s ears explode from both sides of its head like dueling pony tails on a spoiled baby. It has that nervous look in its eye that says "I was bred for skeet shooting, but if I prance around maybe nobody will realize."