Found this on a Buddy and Julie discussion page. Thought some of my buddies might a kick out of it:
On the first day God created the twang and the Lord heard the twang and saw that it was good and said let there be Telecasters!!
And on the second day He created the Deluxe Reverb, and thus
a beautiful twang was heard throughout the heavens and earth below.
And the man loved the Telecaster and small combo amp that the Lord had provided. And the Lord told the man "go forth and enjoy the Deluxe's built-in reverb and tremolo effects" but commanded the man to stay away from Guitar Center especially the stomp box counter saying on the day that you enter therein thy tone will suffer.
But the man entered into Guitar Center where the serpent at the stompbox counter showed the man a small, orange compressor and the man placed the device between the guitar and the amplifier the Lord had provided and saw that his tone was mysteriously enhanced. But his eyes were now opened to other strange devices on display and the man began to lust after the bright colored boxes.
And the Lord was angered by the man's blasphemy and said to the man "because you were not satisfied with my gifts you shall toil in the fields in vain to satisfy your gear lust". And to the serpent the Lord said "because you have tempted the man and corrupted his signal chain you will suffer spending the rest your days locked inside Guitar Center listening to adolecent boys trying to play Metallica riffs at ear shattering volume".